Our November was (and is always) a chaotic, joyful mix of celebrations. It all began with a late fall wedding 18 years ago, followed by Aiza’s entry into the world 6 years later, and Mikhail’s birth 7 years after that. I probably should have planned better, but here we are, with back to back birthdays and a harried anniversary squeezed in between every November.
This year I felt reflective in a way I normally don’t. Is it being properly into my 40s? Or perhaps seeing my eldest enter the 7th grade, a full on middle-schooler, and realizing that a significant chunk of parenting has passed? Somewhere amidst making breakfasts, tidying their bedrooms, teaching them to read, and family holidays, 12 years have passed. All my kids are in school and I have my days to myself…
Okay, enough reminiscing. Let’s dive into November’s favourite things.
wearing:
Earlier this year I had set the intention of consuming more mindfully. The internet can leave us feeling weird about clothes. Buying things we don’t want or need, then looking at our closets wondering why we hate everything and have nothing to wear. I have many theories on how this happens and am on a JOURNEY to change this model of existence, but one thing I wanted to implement was slowing down my purchases and spending my money on quality pieces that would last. This isn’t a hard and fast, but something I’m leaning into more and more.
What you realize when you shift to slow-er fashion, is that there are loads of accounts and creators who talk about purchasing mindfully, understanding your personal style, and choosing quality over quantity. Some of the accounts I’ve been following are: @allisonbornstien on TikTok and IG, @vicfilipinni on Tik Tok, and @natalieborton on IG. If we want to change our consumption habits, then who we follow and what we look at really matters.
In the spirit of buying quality over quantity, I’ve been perusing sweaters made with a 100% natural fibres, fabrics like wool, cashmere, and alpaca. I fell in love with the alpaca sweater from Everlane and all the cashmere at Jcrew. The sweaters at Jcrew are definitely more expensive than ones I’ve bought in the past. If one’s a savvy shopper and label reader, there are many well-priced sweaters made from natural fibres out there, it just takes some effort. I’ll share more mid-range pieces as I find them.
sharing a couple of links as well:
Everlane alpaca, (top left) comes in SO many beautiful colours and currently on sale
Jcrew cashmere classic-fit crewneck in black (top right)
Check out the shrunken collection at Jcrew as well, loads of fun colours and great cuts if you want something that’s shorter and works with high waisted bottoms.
cooking:
I went through several food phases over the fall. Periods of not cooking in panic over the news, comfort food that would feed everyone - basically big pots of carbs - and then project cooking, an immersive experience to channel my anxious thoughts.
Some of the tastiest things I made (and you can too) were, taheri from Shehar Bano Rizvi’s Virsa, a homey pot of rice and potatoes, cheats bolognese (good quality ground meat and Rao’s jarred sauce taking center stage), crispy spice rubbed chicken thighs ala my air fryer (recipe my own, coming soon), several dishes from Alison Roman’s friendsgiving menu (the stuffing and green beans were perfect), and Samin Nosrat’s buttermilk chicken (a MUST if you haven’t made it).
eating:
I haven't been going out much these last few months, but a notable meal was Osteria Giulia for my 18th wedding anniversary. The interior was all sleek, tan wood and dim lighting, each table set with a fluted candle holder, the flame reflecting in bands of light. It was romantic and cozy, while also feeling elegant and eventful. I’ve realized I don’t like overly formal restaurants and anything that feels like fine dining. I’m sure Giulia falls into those categories with its Michelen star, but it did so without any of the stuffiness and stress. The food was excellent; my favourite either the grilled calamari with charred peppers or the thinly baked Focaccia de Recco that reminded me of cheese manakeesh. Their take on a classic tiramisu made with dark chocolate and mascarpone cream was the perfect way to end the night.
I also made my way down to Houston, Texas at the start of the month to see family. The most notable meal there being the karahi at famed Pakistani restaurant Aga’s, insanely delicious and insanely spicy, each bite chased with a gulp of mango lassi. Was the meal worth the four Tums I required to soothe my reflux? Yes, yes it was. But perhaps more than the meal, what I’ll remember was how diverse the crowd at the restaurant was. People from all races and religions - families, groups of friends, and couples, crowding around steaming pans of tandoori and karahi, a jug of lassi at every table. It was pretty wonderful to witness how food brings people together in a way that little else can.
trying:
We all know I’m always on the hunt for anything that will give me glow-y skin. Mine is quite dry and unless I’m slathered in moisturizing creams, drenched in oil at night, and topped off with something dewy in the day, my skin can feel tight and uncomfortable. I recently ran out of my Glossier futuredew, probably my third bottle to date, and decided to try the Saie Glowy Illuminator in Starglow. I haven’t decided if I like it better, but it is lovely and also clean beauty if you’re looking for something in that category. Any dewiness as of late is thanks to the illuminator and my trusted Chanel balme - bless the salesperson at Shoppers who told me about it.
giving
Doctors without Borders, Save the Children, UNICEF and the UNRWA have been top of mind to support as they do the dangerous and difficult work of serving injured and traumatized children and civilians. I continue to have so much respect for doctors and healthcare workers, witnessing them risk their lives for their patients. It all continues to remind me that our abundance and blessings are meant to be shared. Most of what I’m writing here was clouded by my general sadness and despair at the current state of our world.
reading:
The last few months my fiction reading has slowed down. I spend most evenings reading the news instead of getting quiet with a book. I did finish Lessons in Chemistry by Bonnie Gramus which is both hilarious and intelligent - a reflection of the prejudice and struggles of being a female scientist in the 1950s. I laughed out loud while reading and loved the ending.
I’m currently reading, albeit hardly a few pages a night, Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver. It’s gotten loads of acclaim and I remember loving the Poisonwood Bible many years ago, but I haven’t hit my stride with it yet; the experiences of foster care, abuse, and addiction feel pretty heavy right now. I may just pause and pick up something like Romantic Comedy by Curtis Sittenfield, Everything I Know About Love by Dollie Alderton, or Hello Beautiful by Ann Napolitano, all sitting in my Indigo cart.
At the start of the year I made a goal on Good Reads to read 30 books. I hoped to be meticulous about tracking them, writing mini reviews and all, but fell off sometime around March (shocker, but hey, goals are good). I have been reading though, and believe I’m somewhere near 20. I’ll save my final count and favourite reads for my end of the year newsletter.
mothering:
Finally, November took me down the path of understanding DFKs, i.e. deep feeling kids, i.e. what I probably was as a child, i.e. what I’ve given birth to. Motherhood is the core of my daily life and I care a lot about being a conscious mother to my three very different children. I also just want to be a happy mother, something that can quickly get buried under the sheer work load of raising three kids. But I don’t want to look back at this time and remember being resentful and frustrated. I want to enjoy my kids, enjoy motherhood, enjoy being my real self IN motherhood, and in order to do that I commit daily to addressing whatever comes up inside of me and with my kids. I recently completed the two-part workshop with Dr. Becky in the Good Inside community and it was incredibly helpful. My membership there has been some of the best money I’ve spent. I would highly recommend it if you have a child with big feelings and emotions or if you’re someone who feels the same.
Looking ahead, I’m excited for December. The holiday concerts, end of year celebrations, recaps and reflections. Thanks for being here and letting me share the tiny, the big, the everyday, and the important.
Love,
Sana